Dear Diary
by WickedWorld6897
Summary: Both Loren and Eddie's POV on everything that happens. -told through diaries and letters-
1. Dear Diary

**Hi guys, so I told you I was going to write another story. Well, this truly is something different. Let me know what you think of it, please let me know what you think and if you think I should continue... This takes place after the last episode of HH... I just had this idea in my head and I needed to get it out... Anyways, Enjoy..!**

_Dear Diary, _

_The last few days have been so exciting! I have gotten back from New York and me and Eddie have been incredibly busy. But I don't mind, as long as I'm with Eddie. I want to spent every single minute of every day with him, I never want to loose him again. However, I'm pretty confident he doesn't want to loose me either, he keeps telling me how happy he is that I'm in his life._

_I remember how stupid I felt after I had told Eddie I loved him for the first time. _

_"Back at cha." He had simply responded, I felt like the dumbest piece of person that had ever had the misfortune of being in this world._

_That phrase had turned into an inside joke. God I love him, everything about him is simply perfect. _

_My career is taking off and my concert in NY went great. I'm still all pumped up even though it was about a week ago. Kelly has been over the moon ever since we got back from NY. I'm actually a little suspicious about Kelly, I mean, I get that she's excited about my career, so am I, but I just get the feeling that she has been more cheerful ever since Jake and Traci got divorced. Is that wrong to think? I have no idea why I feel that way, however I just know that Eddie loved Traci and I feel sorry for Jake. He's having a rough time dealing with all of this. Although no one has the right to judge him for that._

_ I, myself hope to never get a divorce. And of course the chances of living a happy life with a loving husband are very slim, I am convinced that my luck has turned. Before, I was sure that nothing was going my way. I was stuck in thinking about how things could have been. While now, I don't care about what could have been. I care about what's going to come, my life with Eddie. I guess it's no surprise that I picture him in my happy married fairy-tale future, I can see us being together forever. But there's always this person inside of my head, telling me that he's going to leave me. Although the voice is now more like a careless whisper as it used to be a loud shouting voice._

_My mom and Max are also busy with moving Max into our little Valley-house. I recall being pretty surprised when my mom told me that Max was going to move in with us. _

_'With us...' I have to admit, I'm not one hundred percent sure if I'm still living at home. I spend most of my nights at Eddie's place. -Or Eddie's palace- And that place already feels like a second home. Eddie keeps on telling me that I should just move in and that I've been practically living at his place for quite some time.  
_

_I want to move in with Eddie, I'm just not sure why he wants me to. Maybe he really wants me around but maybe there's some other reason... One I don't know of. _

_Plus, if I move in with Eddie I wouldn't get any homework done, that's for sure. I can't keep my hands off that boy. Kelly has suggested that I'd just drop out and forget about high school and collage all together various times, the weird thing is that I'm actually considering it. Would that be wrong? To just forget about everything I have worked all these years for, it does sound appealing to have more time for music. Oh who am I kidding? It sounds appealing to have more time for Eddie. When did I become a love drunk teen? _

_I've changed a lot in these last few weeks, other that just becoming a love drunk teen and changing my style. Although I have allowed Kelly to made a few more changes about my appearance, I didn't want her to change too much. For example, she thought it was a good idea to get some tattoos on my arms and one on my lower back to 'edge things up', as she called it. She had also suggested dying my hair, I never wanted to do that. Not because I don't like the way it looks. For example, I'd love to be a blonde for one day. But dying your hair is just something so permanent._

_Eddie wants me to run every change Kelly wants to make by him first. He told me that he doesn't want me to make any mistakes, while mistakes are a part of life.. Aren't they? However, it is sweet how he wants to protect me. _

_I won't judge Eddie, he's everything I ever dreamed of, everything I ever wanted and much more. _

_I have to go now, I'm meeting Mel in a few. Mel is crazy as always. She and Lisa have gotten better somehow, I have no idea when and how it happened. Maybe with Adriana being pregnant Lisa sees that things could be worse. Whatever the case is, it's not really my business. Mel will tell me if she thinks it is._

_Love, _

_Loren._

**Sooo? What do you guys thing? Do you love it, do you hate it? Tell me please! And I need an idea how to get Eddie's point of view in this, or should I only get Loren's? Well... Please review! **


	2. Dear Mom

**Yes yes yes, chapter two. So I figured out what this story is going to be. I'm thinking of multiple things. Some letters maybe poems or lyrics, and in Loren's case, her diary. This one took me some time to figure out. I know this isn't really a story yet, it's kind of just a bunch of feels, but it'll turn into a story pretty soon. Please review, I love reviews. Enjoy!**

_Dear mom,_

_I know that you can't read this. However, I like to think that you can. I can always feel your presence. I just wanted to tell you about what has been going on._

_I met this girl, a while ago. She saved me, although that might sound a little dramatic, it's true. When I broke up with Chloe I actually told her not to fall in love. I told her it would hurt. And look at her now... But I wouldn't hurt Loren. No one with a heart would hurt the person they love. That just proves again that Chloe has no heart. Only the things she has done in her lifetime, how she can still live with herself is a mystery to me. But it is good to know that Loren will never use me like that. She didn't even want me to help her with getting her career started. __My girl is a star. She has grown so much and I'm really proud of her. It is great to see how much she's 'in her element' with all those Hollywood bigshots. _

_You would love her, ma. I know you would. She told me a story about how she used to write letters to her dad and that inspired me to start writing you._

___"Soon enough, letters became poems and poems became lyrics." That's what Loren said about her letters to her dad. It is how she started writing. Her music truly is great and whenever I hear her sing I get the feeling that it comes right from her heart. _

_Something that is really bothering me is my new music. Well, not the songs themselves, but the overall reaction of the crowd to them. I always thought that the fans would follow me, no matter what. Even Loren said that it was nothing like the 'first sound she had fallen in love with'. What does that really mean? I know she loves me, but I want her honest opinion. Because in my opinion the songs are great. I'm in a different place right now and so is my music._

_I just need someone to give me the kind of feedback you used to give me. Loren tries to be honest, but she is way too nice to tell me if she thinks the songs suck. Her overall personality is just so sweet. I feel like I'm a better person around her.  
_

_My album is coming out this summer... My third already. Jake is really pushing me to do all kinds of publicity things, while he knows I hate interviews and such. Pops always says that things used to be 'simpler' back in the day. _

_All that aside, the thing that is constantly on my mind -besides Loren of course-, is the accusations against Chloe. They are saying that she killed you. And with 'they' I mean both Tyler and Lily. There was always something about Chloe that I couldn't figure out and somehow that feeling stayed when I recovered that her mom was alive. However, now, that feeling is gone so I'm fearing that it was the truth. _

_I am afraid that I was planning on marrying the girl that I was planning on marrying. And Lily wants to go public with the story. Jake thinks it not that bad of an idea. He thinks Chloe will get what she deserves through that. But she doesn't deserve to be hated by everybody, no, she deserves way worse. Although I have no idea what she deserves. Maybe she deserves jail, maybe she deserves a miserable life with Tyler Rourke. Or maybe she doesn't even deserve the time that I'm spending writing about her right now. _

_And I kind of feel guilty about not wanting to talk to Loren about this. She wants me to tell her what's on my mind. But my mind is just so messed up and almost the exact opposite of the picture she has in her head of me. I never felt like this about a girl. It's an amazing feeling, yet her mom told me that she was having doubts about whether I would stay or not. I want her to know that I'm not going anywhere. _

_Speaking of her mother, she's very much like an older Loren. No, that isn't exactly the term. She actually quite a lot like you. It feels weird saying that because no one could ever replace you. Although I know she's trying to fill up the emptiness and I have the feeling she has already filled up a part. She and pops are getting pretty serious. I know you'd only be happy for him but he seems to have some doubts about that. _

_It felt good talking to you in a way. I might continue doing this. _

_Lots of love from your son, Eddie. _


End file.
